TLV IC Inbox

[inthebiblicalsense]

[In a very serious, business tone, Abel's answering machine sounds after any attempted calls that aren't responded to right away.]

You've reached Abel. I am not available at the moment, but I'll get back to you as soon as I can. If this is urgent, leave the line open.

And if this is Fitz I hope you're having a good day.

Comments

[reargunner]

I keep trying to do that. I do. I guess... it's why I came around to this.

[A small gesture at the tablet and the half-done sketches. He's quiet for a few moments.]

I can choose who I spend time with. Who my friends are. What I do with my day and when I do it. [There's an odd, forced evenness about his voice.] But it doesn't take the background noise away. That this place is just a prison, and I'm trapped here.

[He closes his eyes, takes a breath in and lets it out. His fingernails slowly disengage from where they'd dug into his palms.]

... Sorry. [Sigh.] I know you want to fix it, and I know you can't, and I know that's hard. I just can't pretend to be okay all the time.

[inthebiblicalsense]

Acting like and pretending things are fine feels safe...I know that, but... even if its uncomfortable for me? I don't need or want you to feel like you have to pretend with me all the time. That isn't fair to you.

[He gives him a gentle shake, attempting a smile.]

You don't usually talk to me about these things, and...honestly, even if it truly sucks, and I hate that you feel this way, I don't hate that you feel comfortable enough to say something.

I don't have to fix things, as much as I want to. You trusting me to listen, even though we both know im solution oriented, that's...this feels right. That you're not doing it by yourself.

[reargunner]

[He studies Ethan for a few quiet moments, then smiles softly and leans over to rest his head against the other man's shoulder. He nudges his head up gently into the curve of Ethan's neck.]

I know I don't have to do it all by myself.

[Alexei has been shown that, and he does understand, even if there are some things he still keeps under wraps.]

But— I'd like to be able to do more of it with you.

[inthebiblicalsense]

[Something warms in his chest, raising his arm and putting it around Alexei to squeeze his shoulder, resting his chin on top of his head.]

I'd like that too, even if I might fuck it up sometimes... I don't do it on purpose, but I think I'm getting better.

We both are, and it's nice, to have the time to grow together, you know? That's...As much as I wish you weren't trapped here, I get to spend this time with you, away from home, the Alliance, the war? [A breath, short before he releases it, pressing a kiss to his hair.]

I couldn't ask for this, but I'm glad we're here together if we have to be here at all.

[reargunner]

[Mm. That's nice. Sometimes - a lot more than he used to, really - he prefers these moments of soft intimacy over other, more carnal things. He listens to what Ethan says and lets out a little snort, a huff, but doesn't argue.

Ethan's being sappy. He'll allow it.]

Yeah. [He'd rather not be trapped here too, but he supposes it could be worse...]

... I guess we should sketch out a backup plan in case the Admiral doesn't like the idea of a loft. [Because the Admiral is an ass, and Alexei wants to have something to fall back on so he's not disappointed if he says no.]

[inthebiblicalsense]

[He doesnt get to be sentimental often or openly when he wants to, so he just smiles into Alexei's hair when he humors him.]

You want to relax on the couch? Read a book or something? I can do a few different mock ups while you wait, we can work shop what you like about them after?

[reargunner]

Hm? You sure? Wasn't expecting you to do all the work.

[And he did manage to get kind of into it, after all.]

[inthebiblicalsense]

Your input is important, but I do actually need some time to finish the concept. I'm not just turning in some slapped together sketches, you know?

[He's not saying he can't help, but this will take some time.] I want it to look nice, and nice takes a while.

[reargunner]

Okay, okay.

[Hands up. He slides out of his seat and briefly ruffles his hand over Ethan's hair, then leans down to kiss the side of his head.]

Do whatever you need to, then. I'll be over there.

[On the couch. Reading. Probably in a weird position.]

[inthebiblicalsense]

Hey- [Before Alexei can walk away, Ethan catches his shirt, managing a kiss to his cheek before he lets him go.]

I'll come over and ask you what you think in a bit.

[And, popping in his eyebuds, he'll enjoy the comfortable quiet of parallel play for as long as it'll take him to get a few good sketches done.]